November Slut of the Month: Vulvatron

This fall, the universe spread its legs and spawned the unholy Vulvatron as Gwar‘s new bloody-breasted vocalist. Since we love monstrously powerful women (and the scum-infested metal of Gwar), we couldn’t be more pleased to feature this intergalactic slut as November’s own Slut of the Month. You can catch the towering, fearsome warrior in the flesh on the band’s latest gore, um, tour, and if you’re lucky, you might have the exquisite pleasure of bathing in her boob spew.

ed-steele-GWAR-gas-monkey-live-dallas-tx-7521

I am: Vulvatron of GWAR

By Day: Usually trying to tackle the persistent problem of reconciling the equations of Quantum Mechanics with the Theory of Relativity, working on my tactical skills for the battlefield, Wu Shu Sword Style, lingerie shopping, or hungover from the night before.

By Night: Dealing with unruly primitive beasts, wrangling the other unruly primitive beasts that comprise the band, precision tuning my armor, vocal supremacy, or entertaining many optimized specimens of the male species in futile attempt to quench my voracious sexual thirst.

ed-steele-GWAR-gas-monkey-live-dallas-tx-7310

My Vices: Crack, space Vikings, highly unstable radioactive isotopes

My Virtues: I am able to virtually project my image through many dimensions simultaneously.

The Present: 2014 AD in Earth years

The Future: 69000 Earth years in the current inertial frame, from whence I come.

ed-steele-GWAR-gas-monkey-live-dallas-tx-7346

Favorite Flavor: Ethyl Alcohol

Favorite Feeling: Clitoral stimulation

Favorite Fabric: the fabric of the space-time continuum

ed-steele-GWAR-gas-monkey-live-dallas-tx-7277

Substance is: usually crack

Style is: Versace Intergalactic Armor Private Label Fall collection 69001

Slut is: in my hotel room!

unnamed
ALL LIVE IMAGES: Ed Steele for Dallas Observer